Sunday 19 October 2014

A list of things that are the fault of David Cameron


CAMERON: RUINING ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING SINCE APRIL 2010

Five years on almost, and still David Cameron and his merry band of shits blame the last government for EVERYTHING. This is my rival list of what David Cameron is to blame for and I want to know what is being done about it.

It is raining again.

People letting their dogs crap in the street.

Manchester United.

Coffee that tastes like cat pee.

Land mines.

The Vietnam War.

Hitler.

Work

The fact that George Osborne is a twat.

The fact the rest of them are also twats.

The Beatles breaking up.

Ruining football.

Getting old and dying.

The fact that Henry VIII had his best mate beheaded along with two of his wives.

Paul Scholes.

Litter everywhere.

Bubonic Plague; Leprosy & Polio.

Wonga.

Stealth farting in lifts.

Bad hair days.

Rabies.

Margaret Thatcher.

Sunderland losing 8-0.

Potholes.

The fact that my car broke down last week.

The fact that I bought decaff by mistake and now it's 11pm on a Sunday and  absolutely nothing  can be done for it.

Too many shite television programmes.

The actors in Emmerdale.

The monarchy, especially Prince Philip.

Nasty religions.

Lou Macari.

The decline of Blackpool's tourist industry.

Mel Gibson & Tom Cruise.

The fact that Wayne Rooney's hair transplant is not a success.

Elton John.

Road works.

Earthquakes in the tropics.

Tsunamis in the tropics.

The X Factor.

Ginger hair (no offence).

The Ebola Virus.

People who sing at parties.

People who think it's okay to criminalize cannabis.

The fact that the Labour Party is shit.

The fact that the Lib Dems are shit.

Grimsby.

The fact that everywhere you turn, there are stupid people.



Liverpool not winning the League.

Ignorance.

People who can't control their shopping trolleys and ram into you with them.

Jimmy Tarbuck.

Shite music.

Right wing loonies.

Sinkholes in the USA.

The fact that England's football team is perpetually shite.

EVERYTHING ELSE.

Mrs 1 Liesalot (but not about this).
October 2014